Starting the Process

I’m actually starting the process of looking at homes to buy.  I’ve talked with a lender and now I’m meeting with a realtor on Friday for a meeting/interview.  It’s a little scary, but so exciting.  I hope I’m not overwhelming particular when I had over my “wish” list and my “must have” list.

I’ve called a “family meeting” for this weekend to discuss how this is going to play out.  I want to have my parent’s full support in whatever decision I make.  I have learned that, when I don’t have their full support, I probably shouldn’t do whatever I was planning because it will prove to be a bad idea.

I’m just so excited to start the process I’ve been waiting for since I moved here…or before really!  Something about home ownership makes me feel like I’ll finally be grown up! :)

Busy Season is OVER

FINALLY! Those extra three days (because of Emancipation Day--which only exists in Washington D.C) were brutal!





I'm so excited to have evenings free again. Except I've already made plans for every day this week. Tonight, I'm getting my hair cut and highlighted for the first time since mid-February--can we say roots? At least my hair is somewhat close to the natural color so it's not too bad. Tomorrow, I think I'm having dinner with a good friend that I've known since we were 11. We've tenatively made plans, but haven't firmed anything up yet. Thursday, I have an appointment to try the new Shellac Manicure--it's supposed to stay chip-free and glossy for 14 days. We shall see...anyway, that's my post-busy season treat to myself.





I'm also thinking about doing a little shopping tonight. I really need some summer work clothes since I haven't worked in the summer since I was an engineering intern and, let's face it, we didn't really dress business casual. It was more just casual. I wore nice jeans more often than not, so I really need pants/capris. Especially after 5 years at Auburn when the official summer dress code is a t-shirt, shorts (Nike) and Rainbows. :) I don't know if I'll stick to my normal online shopping or not, but I'm actually thinking about looking at Target. I've only bought a few things there before, but I'm following a few blogs that post about cute steals they snag there. I don't know if my luck will be so good...we shall see!





At some point, I need to catch up on laundry. I haven't been caught up in at least two months and I'm ready to put winter clothes away. It would be nice if they were clean first, so I better get moving. :) I won't be here this weekend, but maybe next week will have a little more time at home and I can get my apartment in order again.





I guess that's all for now. Until next time...

Missing Her

Even though I haven’t talked to her on the phone for nine weeks tonight, I still miss talking to her so much.  I know I complained about how loud I had to talk or how many times she just couldn’t understand what I was saying, but I miss our talks.  I miss hearing about her day, what she ate, who visited and how she was feeling.  I’m missing our talks so much more than I did over the first seven weeks because for the last week and a half, I’ve known there would be no more phone calls.  I wish I remembered what exactly we talked about that last night.  I remember discussing the chocolate icing for Aunt Loverta’s cake, but really that’s it.  I’m sure I said “I love you” because I always did, but I wish I could pick up the phone and tell her one more time.

My Tribute

My sweet Grams went home to our Lord in Heaven Wednesday afternoon.  She lived a long, full life and left a legacy that will not be soon forgotten.  I am so grateful for the 23 1/2 years I was blessed to have her on Earth.  Now I have another guardian angel and she’s able to finally tell Daddy’s parents what it was like to be my Grandmother.

I didn’t get the opportunity to have two sets of Grandparents on Earth, so I was blessed with the very best set of Grandparents a girl could wish for.  From six weeks of age, I stayed with Grams almost every day while Mom and Dad worked.  Grandaddy came home to visit at lunch time, but most of the days were Grams and Katie time.  I even had a crib in Gram’s basement so she could sew while watching me.  I spent so much time in that basement as a child.  She would sew and I would visit with everyone who came for alterations while also watching tv and laying on the deep freeze (something Mom and her sister were never allowed to do as children—what Granddaughters get away with!).

No offense to Mom, but I feel like almost everything I know about cooking is because of Grams.  I can’t remember a time that I didn’t know how to make toast or scrambled eggs.  We made cheese straws together and I remember how proud I was of my first pound cake made from Gram’s recipe.  We made caramel cake together and Aunt Loverta’s chocolate icing.  She taught me how to make my favorite chicken with white sauce and her “rounds” and sometimes there’s nothing I want more than her version of boxed macaroni and cheese.  She would fry me an entire pound of bacon, but would make me eat bread or crackers so I wasn’t just eating bacon for a meal.  I never quite mastered fried chicken like hers.  Something about my breading just isn’t right.  I guess practice will have to make perfect.

I can’t sew that well, but thankfully, Mom can, so some of Gram’s skills will hopefully still be passed on to me.  I want to learn to make simple valances for my new home (once I pick it out) and I need to learn to hem my own pants.  Unfortunately, I never learned to crochet.  I think that particular skill passed on with Grams.  I don’t think I would have had the patience anyway.

Grams took me to school and picked me up every day (except Daddy’s Grandmother’s two days a week to bring me home in the afternoon) from Kindergarten to 5th grade.  I could always count on the “purple” Park Avenue being there waiting for me in the afternoons. 

Grams could grow practically anything imaginable.  Over the past few days, the plants and flowers around town have been much more apparent to me.  I think Grams is making them a little prettier than usual to tell me she’s ok.  I’m hoping to get a few cuttings of her plants one day and to try to continue her legacy.

Grams and Grandaddy were married for 65 years.  That alone is a remarkable achievement.  I know marriage is difficult, but they were able to make it work.  I said many times that there is nothing cuter than an old couple who still love each other.  Grandaddy looked so precious when he would kiss Grams and she lit up at the sight of him.  I hope I am blessed with the kind of love they shared (and I believe continue to share—death is not an end to love).

My Grams was a remarkable person—not perfect—but a loving, God-fearing woman.  I have no doubts about where she is because the Bible tells us that those who love the Lord, accept him, and ask him into their heart will be rewarded with Eternal Life.  That knowledge helps me to get up each day and put one foot in front of the other.

I love you Grams…until then…

Faith

There are times when I’m unwavering in my faith, but also times when I’m not so sure…I don’t understand why God lets people suffer when they are so ready to come home to Him for eternity.  I have to trust that there is a reason for everything He does.  It’s sometimes easier to say that than to believe it.

Grams is not doing well at all.  Apparently, some strokes can bring on dementia.  Basically, her body is still living and breathing and suffering, but I believe her soul has moved on.  The person who remains is not the Grams I love so much.  We lost her seven weeks ago tonight/tomorrow.  I want to mourn her, but it seems so weird to mourn a living person.

She’s coming home Tuesday to spend her final days in familiar surroundings in hopes that she will find some comfort and peace.  We don’t know how long we have left with her earthly body, but we are going to do everything to make her comfortable and to provide even a tiny bit of quality of life.

Why, God, do you allow people who so want to come home to you to linger?  Why don’t you open your arms to her and say to her, “Well done, my good and faithful servant?”

I miss her so much already.  I miss our phone calls every night.  I miss just hearing her voice.  I even miss yelling at her to get her to hear me.

I love you Grams.  Thank you for loving me and taking care of me all my life.  I KNOW I will see you again.  I won’t say goodbye, so instead I will say… until then.